There is no balance between work, family and running. There's only compromise. My wife and daughter do without me as I disappear to races. They compromise. If I don't race to the edge of my ability the worst part is that I feel like I let them down. Not only was I gone for most of the day but I don't have anything to show for it.
The PCTR Pirates Cove 50K couldn't have been held on a more perfect day. Not too much wind, not too hot. The pre-dawn view of the Golden Gate Bridge and the City was mesmerizing. The lights twinkling and dancing on the water.
The Marin Headlands were sparkling with Wildflowers. Even before the sun came up a full moon set over the Pacific.
The race was a non-event for me. By mile ten it was clear I had nothing left and that a long hike was all that awaited me out on the course. I kept going and picked it up the last five miles to edge into a lackluster seventh place.
I don't know how exactly I'm going to push apart the Scylla and Charybdis of Work and Family enough to get some solid training in. I'm angling for a new job so I can't slack off to slip on the running shoes at lunch. We just sold our house and are occupied looking for the next one.
But runners are optimists. If we weren't how would we ever keep running if we didn't think we would improve? Running is an act of faith. If I run it means I believe I can be more than what I am today. Today it just happens there is a lot of room for improvement.